Bigger Boys And Stolen Sweethearts
by outwittingsquirrels
Summary: Alex Thompson. Alex bloody Thompson. A Ravenclaw, smarter, better looking, funnier, tall, dark and handsome. Bloody hell, it’s a wonder she ever went out with me in the first place. Rose/Scorpius, Rose/OC, mild Teddy/James. For the 'I never' challenge.


**Disclaimer**: I'd never curse a child with the name Scorpius. It's just pure cruelty.

_Scorpius_

'Alex Thompson. Alex fucking Thompson. A Ravenclaw, smarter, better looking, tall, dark and handsome, funnier. Bloody hell, it's a wonder she ever went out with me in the first place. He even fucking plays Quidditch!' I said miserably, plopping down next to Ryan at lunch.

'There she is,' he replied, jerking his head to the entrance of the Great Hall where she - the 'she' in question may I add - stood with the Alex fucking Thompson in question snogging her face off. Sickening.

'Sickening,' I spat.

'Slut,' Ryan said dismissively. I bristled slightly and then remembered that she _was_ snogging the face off Alex fucking Thompson right back. I wasn't jealous of course, perish the thought. I just didn't want to see my ex girlfriend…ah fuck it, I was jealous.

'Rose bloody Weasley,' I said, dragging my hands down my face tiredly. 'It's not like I even care though, you know?'

'Course not mate,' Ryan agreed immediately, shoving several sausages and four rashers onto my plate.

'She can snog whoever she likes. Even if it makes her look like a slut. Even if she cheated on me. Even if he stole her off me. I don't care.'

'Course. You're better off without her anyway,' Ryan nodded, pouring far too much ketchup on top of my breakfast. Five a day, don't you know.

'Exactly. Still though…'

The two of us watched the new couple kissed once more before heading for their respective tables. The Gryffindor table was over at the opposite side of the Great Hall from the Slytherin one, making it impossible to stare at her dark red hair without meeting the gaze of Alex fucking Thompson.

'At least Dad'll be happy,' I shrugged, turning back to my artery-clogging breakfast.

'That's the way to look at it mate, exactly,' Ryan said, clearly relieved that I wasn't falling into the deadly clutches of teenage angst. 'Match on Saturday anyway, I've money on Gryffindor.'

'Oh yeah, forgot about that…'

Gryffindor versus Ravenclaw. And guess who the Seekers for each team were. That's right. Alex fucking Thompson and Rose bloody Weasley. I frowned slightly.

'I thought you'd be supporting Ravenclaw?'

'Well yeah, obviously I _want_ them to win. I'm just not going to lose money on 'em,' Ryan agreed. 'Thompson's the only decent player they've got.'

I nodded slowly.

_____________

_Albus_

'Isn't Alex just gorgeous?' Rose sighed happily, once I'd sat down across from her in the common room. I groaned.

'Yeah he's alright I suppose,' I replied.

'He's just- I love his hair. You know the way it's so dark and-'

'Rosie, I'm a straight male teenager. _I don't care _about his hair,' I said flatly. Unbelievable. You'd swear she was…you'd swear she was _James_. And at least James had some variety. He didn't go on about Teddy's hair more than once a day for example. But Rose had never gone on about Malfoy like this. Insecurity. That's my guess.

'Fine so,' she said, obviously offended. She snapped her book shut. 'And I know what you're thinking too. I'm _not_ as bad as James.'

I held up my hands. 'Hey I never said a word.'

Rose rolled her eyes exasperatedly. 'And besides, I thought you'd be glad I broke up with Scorpius.'

'Well I am but you know…Thompson's a bastard. And you're playing him on Saturday. If you go easy on him or let him win or anything-'

'Al, please don't insult my intelligence,' Rose interrupted coolly. She opened her book again. 'Have you got your homework done for Potions?'

'Don't change the subject-'

'Have you got your Potions homework done?' she repeated.

Unreal.

_AN: I completely deserve flames for writing this. I can't believe I agreed to this. I've got a poll giving out about Rose/Scorpius fics on my profile. My only defence is that this was written for the 'I never…' challenge. There'll be a few more chapters I think and then I'll never write another word about the couple again…_

_(Apologies to all Rose/Scorpius shippers out there.)_


End file.
